It Takes a Village to Make a Puppet

Our adventure began on a snowy mountainside. The runners, plus Ronin, Dodger, and Aneki, found themselves wearing medieval Japanese clothing and armor and carrying costume-appropriate weapons. As they stood there trying to get their bearings, the group became aware of the fact that everything seemed just a little too real - they had been sucked into DEUS’s virtual world. Further up the mountain, the group could make out a large stone keep. Dodger suggested that getting through the keep would get them through the Wall (an imposing name for a firewall) and give them a chance at getting to DEUS.

Upon reaching the gate, the group was met by a large wooden gate. Clem, Pary, and Rhineholt, using their combined strength, were able to lift the gate, and the whole group entered the keep together. They entered to find themselves in a courtyard with three metal gates leading away to three walled subdivisions. The way forward seems to be through a large metal door with two giant keyholes.

The runners peeked through the right gate to see a village of Oni. The demons were big - almost the size of a troll - and blue, with huge horns and a third eye in the middle of their foreheads. Also occupying the village were meta-humans strung up like marionettes. As the runners watched, the Oni picked up random puppet strings, controlling the meta-humans as they built cottages only for other Oni-controlled meta-humans to come through and tear them down moments later. One Oni popped open the top of a puppet’s head, scooped out his brains, and ate them.

Not really wanting to face the Oni but also not seeing many other options, the runners decided to enter the right gate in search of a key for the main gate. Ronin picked the lock to the smaller, gate, and the group snuck in to hide around the village huts. From their newfound vantage point, they could see a Chieftain Oni with a giant red key hanging from his belt, flanked by two lesser Oni. Pary, being the smallest and hardest to spot, crept out of hiding and towards the chieftain in hopes of stealing the key. Unfortunately, the Oni goons had better eyesight than the team had estimated, and everyone’s favorite little dwarf was spotted.

As the Oni turned towards her, Pary darted back towards the rest of her team, hoping to at least have backup when she had to face the Oni. Unfortunately, the Oni were also a little quicker than the team had estimated, and Pary was soon in the clutches of a few Oni goons, who held her up between them and started pulling out string to make themselves a new puppet…

At this point, Clem charged into the group, axe swinging furiously. One of the Oni holding Pary released her arm as Clem’s axe crashed into his middle. Rhineholt followed close behind the orc, cutting through the other restraining Oni’s middle with his katana. As the second Oni released her, Pary fell into the snow below. Ronin appeared behind the charging runners in glowing armor, wielding a flaming sword and looking all around just pretty awesome. In a bold voice, he bellowed, “Leave her alone, or I shall exact my wrath upon thee!”

As one being, the entire village dropped to one knee. The runners watched in awe and confusion as the Oni approached Ronin reverently, referring to him as “The Betrayer” and carrying him around on their shoulders as if he were a returning hero. Those not carrying Ronin reached out for Aneki, calling him “The Father”, and tied him to a large stick, burning-at-the-stake style. At Ronin’s command that they release him, they grudgingly tied Aneki’s ankle to the stake instead, but it soon became clear to the runners that the Oni were planning to roast Aneki and feast on him to celebrate The Betrayer’s return.

Evening fell quickly on the little village. Finally finding a way to get close to Ronin amid the crowd of Oni, the runners learned that he had no idea what was happening. It had become clear to him, though, that the Oni planned to keep him as their king forever - a captive on a pedestal. After a rather impressive speech that played up his better attributes, Ronin asked the Oni to give him the Red Key as a gift to celebrate his return. The Oni refused, saying that Ronin was cool and all, but not cool enough to give up their “sacred treasure”. (But cool enough to be made king eternal? For sure, for sure…) In the midst of the babble, the runners managed to figure out that there was an enemy clan of Oni on the other side of the courtyard, and the two clans had managed to capture each other’s keys. Needless to say, there was a good amount of animosity between the two.

Hoping to have better luck through the left gate (and hoping to return before Aneki was eaten), the runners and Dodger headed back the way they came. They entered the left gate to find an Oni village much like the first, but different in a few subtle (just kidding) ways. The Oni that ruled this village were red instead of blue, and the slaves that they “employed” were chained together, growing and harvesting food for the Oni overlords. Pary shoved Dodger out into view, anticipating an awed and adoring crowd to come flooding from everywhere with a neat nickname for Dodger and plans to make him their king.

Unfortunately for Dodger, that is not at all what happened. Instead, a group of nearby Oni threw him to the ground and started whipping him brutally. The runners drew their weapons and charged into the group - Clem swinging his axe wildly back and forth, Pary kneecapping everything she could with her spiked club and cackling madly, Rhineholt slicing through everything in his path with his katana. The Oni backed away from Dodger, not quite sure what to make of this band of angry meta-humans chopping through their ranks. Thinking quickly, the team took advantage of the chaos they had caused and turned to run back towards the blue side, Clem carrying Dodger, Pary kneecapping as many Oni as she could reach on the way out, and Rhineholt leading the pack like a pro.

The red Oni played right into the runners’ plan. They gave chase angrily, following the runners into the center courtyard. When they reached the gate to the blue side, however, the Oni came to an abrupt halt, apparently hesitant to enter the enemy territory. Deciding to divide and conquer, Rhineholt ran into the Blue village and announced that the Reds were weakened and would be easy to defeat, while Pary stood at the border and hurled insults at the Reds.

“Your mama’s so ugly she makes babies cry!”

As you can see, Pary’s insult skills could have been better. The Reds refused to cross the border. Pary ran into the Blue village, and she and Ronin tag-teamed to make suitably dramatic and moving speeches, managing to rile up the Blues. Meanwhile, Clem (who apparently has more insult skills than Pary) stood just across the border and told the Reds that they were a bunch of weenies. This was the last straw - the Reds streamed angrily into the Blue territory.

The Blues, stirred by Pary and Ronin’s speeches and incensed at the Reds’ intrusion into their territory, grabbed the strings of the nearest puppets and charged into battle. As the Oni fought each other, Clem started to chop his way through the crowd, singing, “I’m a lumberjack and it’s okay, I chop down Reds and Blues all day…” Rhineholt followed close behind, slicing through any Oni that managed to avoid the axe. Pary squirreled around the edge of the battle until she reached Aneki, then cut the rope binding him to the stake and leading him quickly away.

Clem, reaching the center of the battle, chopped through both Oni Chieftains and looted the keys from their corpses. As the Chieftains breathed their last, the Oni grunts all turned towards the team, enraged. Clem somehow summoned some sort of crazy berserker mode, swinging his axe through everything, carnage flying everywhere. The terrified Oni backed away from the runners as Clem bellowed, “I’m too sexy for the chiefs!” The runners (now rejoined by Ronin, Dodger, and Aneki) made it to the large gate and used the keys to unlock it, slipping through just in time to escape the mob of Oni behind them.

On the other side of the door, the runners found themselves in a tower that looked like something straight out of Ye Olde Medieval England. They had stumbled into a huge area and found themselves feeling quite dwarfed (nice choice of words, GM) by the scene around them, as everything seemed to be built on a massive scale. The team explored the area until they found the main hall of the keep. In the center of the room lay a huge oak table, set with dishes big enough for even Clem to sleep in. An enormous fireplace took up one wall, and soot covered the floor. On one of the other walls hung a tapestry of Yggdrasil - an ash tree from Norse mythology. Seeing that the soot around the bottom of the tapestry had been disturbed, the runners carefully moved it aside.

Behind the tapestry was a giant mirror. As the runners watched, the mirror filled with flames, which slowly faded into a silvery pool. A big shadow slowly grew in the center, gradually resolving itself into a clawed hand that reached through the mirror towards the team. An entire gigantic creature followed the hand, dripping blood and reaching for Ronin. As the creature tossed Ronin into his mouth and swallowed him whole, the runners recognized the monster as Grendel from the ancient tale Beowulf.

Quickly regaining his composure, Clem muttered, “I knew you were trouble when you walked in,” and embedded his axe in Grendel’s upper thigh. Sticky ichor oozed from the wound as Grendel reached down and scooped up Aneki, tossing him into his mouth and swallowing him with a mighty gulp. Pary kneecapped Grendel with her spiked club, and the monster howled in pain and whirled towards the dwarf. Dodging a swing from Clem’s axe, Grendel lashed out and caught the orc with a giant claw before starting to melt back through the mirror. Without a second thought, Rhineholt pursued Grendel through the mirror, his teammates following behind.

The runners melted through the mirror and into a virtual Garden of Eden, Grendel nowhere to be seen. Trees stretched away in every direction, naked meta-humans tangled up in their roots, fiber optic cables creating rainbows up and down their trunks. As the runners studied the trees, a ripe apple fell slowly from a nearby tree and disappeared into the head of a guy tangled in the roots as if it were a hologram. The runners, realizing that they were now nearing the heart of DEUS, took a moment to steel themselves. There was no going back now.